Is this the Train to Walnut Grove?

Me in my prime Little House watching years...

Toward the end of the Little House run

(When I saw the clip from the Today show tonight with the Little House on the Prairie cast I went straight to this excerpt from my childhood memoir, I'm no David Sedaris, but a few years ago my friend Janie and I did National Novel Writing Month and this is what I decided to write, lol a name has been changed to protect the not so innocent).

         No one was hotter than Michael Landon. Michael Landon was Pa and he was the hottest Pa in Walnut Grove. I lived to see him in his suspenders every Monday night at 7:00. I was there.. glued to the black vinyl leather couch.. I loved it when Ma said “Oh Charles..” in that sweet voice of hers I loved that. Hopefully Mary, Laura and that strange Carrie slept deep because you know Ma and Pa liked each other alot, and there were many cold winter nights in Wisconsin and that was a VERY small cabin.
         I especially loved to hate Nellie and always compared her to Rhoda. A cousin who was very mean to us, well me really. My sister and I would sit there eating our cheetos and fried pies for dessert and when Nellie shoved Laura into the mud, my sister would say, 
       “That was so Rhoda.,” 
         When Nellie flirted with Manly… who I dreamed would be my husband… 
       “Rhoda would totally do that!” she’d say again and fling her Charms blow pop at me from the other side of the couch. 
        “Ummmhmmmm.” I’d answer. 
        The very best thing about Little House was the message every week. They were never subtle. It was the seventies and this was every parent’s answer to the violent cop shows. The Cosby Show had yet to arrive and this and “The Walton’s” was self-parenting at it’s finest.
        Every episode I would tell myself. “You will not cry watching Little House today.” 
       And of course I would.. Mr. Edwards would sing a song.. I’d cry.. The one where Ernest Borgnine played the mountain man and Laura wished her little brother would die and he did. God help her. I stayed in bed all day the over that one, faking the flu..
     “How could Laura do it???” I cried out to my sister.” She willed it to happen…” 
      In my green gingham checked room I dreamed of Manly and his little farm hat and how cool life would be on the Prairie.. Yes, It’s true that Mary went blind and almost died in that school, but those kinds of stories were few and far between and I tried to block that episode out. Little House was my all time favorite show; A family that communicated about everything. Even when Albert came along, I welcomed him. He made up for Willie, whom I never liked. When I heard that Willie was Melissa Gilbert’s real life brother I couldn't believe it. This conversation with my sister last for years. 
       “How can she stand Willie being her brother???? He’s such a dork.. A real lamo and he’s not her brother, he’s Nellie’s.”  We just couldn't accept it.
      What about poor Mr. Olsen?.. He was so sweet and that Mrs. Olsen who’s only redeeming quality was that she looked a little like my neighbor Mrs. Hampton, someone I really liked. I didn’t throw things at the TV when she came on because of that and that only. When I moved to Los Angeles I actually went to Universal Studios and demanded to find out where the Little House town was.. I wanted to be taken there immediately. 
    “ It’s just west of Mankato.” The tour guide said and turned to the front of the tram. 
    “What an ass.” I said to the woman next to me. “You do not blaspheme. I know this tram goes to Walnut Grove. Do not make me call Melissa Gilbert, President of SAG and get you fired.” 
   “Oh there it is… way off in the distance.” He said rolling his eyes. As the tram slowly made it’s way through Leave it to Beaver’s neighborhood.. I settled in, and breathed a sigh of relief. I was on my way to Ma and Pa and all those fake storefronts. I was coming home.

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When I was little my papaw used to tell me I looked like Mary.. I died over that. Let's just say she's held up better than me. I've got to turn things around.. .Lordy..